Last night was the most terrifying night I’ve had in my life since the night I was in labor with Angel.
I awoke at about 1:30 a.m. in lots of pain, with waves of pain rolling across my stomach. I felt nauseous, and I felt like I needed to use the bathroom. (Sorry if you think this is TMI, but it’s my blog…) I got out of bed and went into the bathroom and my body couldn’t decide if I needed to throw up or something else. So I just laid down on the floor because the pain was so terrible. The source of the pain will be obvious to any woman whose ever been in labor (or had Braxton Hicks contractions). I was having frequent, excruciating, terrifying contractions. In between the contractions I both vomited and manged to empty my bowels. Then I just laid on the floor in the bathroom praying that the contractions would stop. Eddy was moving a lot; I was sure to pay attention to that. I didn’t feel like I was in labor, and my water didn’t break or anything. I just prayed and prayed and laid there so scared. I didn’t wake Jim up because I didn’t want him to worry unless I felt there was a reason for us to worry (of course this morning I was scolded for not waking him up). I knew that I might have to wake him up to go to the ER, so I didn’t want to wake him unnecessarily before that.
THANKFULLY my contractions stopped in a short amount of time. But for about 20 minutes I wasn’t sure if I was going into labor and what would happen if I did. I went back to bed and the baby was quiet for a little while and I was terrified because of that, but my body and mind were so exhausted that when I went back to bed I fell automatically asleep. My bladder woke me up around 6 a.m. and I felt little nudges against my belly, but not the big movements I’m used to feeling from this wiggly little girl. So I poked and prodded until she woke up fully and kicked me a lot so I knew she was okay. I fell back asleep to the rhythm of her kicks. When I awoke around 8 for the day I woke her up again so I’d know she was alright.
I was 25 weeks pregnant last Thursday. In two days I’ll be at 26 weeks. (I miscounted last week when I posted that it was 11.5 weeks left… It’s about that now.) I will deliver at 37 weeks, 1 day gestation via scheduled c-section. In 80 days. In 11 weeks and 3 days. She’ll be just past full-term on that date. If she had been born last night there would have been very little chance that she would have survived. And financially I’m not sure that Jim and I could have survived. I am beyond thankful that I was not in labor last night. And I am even more thankful that I’m going to the doctor tomorrow morning, because I can ask him about it, make sure everything is really and truly okay, and be positive that our little girl is safe.
When I told Jim about the incident this morning I was in tears, just thinking about how scared I was for her life. I can’t lose another baby. I just can’t.
25 weeks last Tuesday… Here’s to 11 weeks and 3 days more!